Truly His?

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, 'Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?' And I said, 'Here am I. Send me!' " Isaiah 6:8...."Have we already made the choice to surrender to Him no matter what He says or asks?" Francis Chan

Recently we were having a discussion at the staff meeting of the church where I serve Him during my retirement from "full time ministry." (Is there any such thing....for any of us?) In any case, a brother pastor, also retired, made the statement that he wondered if, in this stage of his life and service to Him, he was still willing to do anything and go anywhere for Him? I had to echo that question; Am I still as willing now as I was when I first embarked on my journey of faith?

When I left the Pittsburgh suburbs for Bible College in 1980, I had just turned 30. I could fit everything I owned in the car I was driving. I didn't take a thought to anything concerning what awaited me. In my young faith, I was sure that He would make a way, open doors, shut others, and care for me in all of my needs. He did just that, and my faith grew deeper and stronger by the day. Then, upon graduation, I received a call to pastor my first church. The District Superintendent told me that he couldn't give me a harder assignment. I was undaunted (and not a little naive) and stepped out in the same kind of faith and trust that had led me to the college. Now I had a family to be responsible for as well, but I wasn't afraid. Someone said that when Jesus called Peter to step out of the boat and onto the water, he first stepped out on the word "Come." I was doing something of the same.

This pattern continued. through my divorce and stepping out of ministry for a season, and the wilderness that accompanied that. It continued upon receiving a call to plant a church in the inhospitable culture of Northern Virginia. In all of it, I continued to step out on that word "come." I'd made the choice that Chan speaks of. Now, in the twilight years of my life and ministry, does that choice still stand? Is it still valid? Do I still say "yes" to whatever He asks? Will I go wherever He sends? I know my heart says yes, but does my mind and body agree? Or, have I reached a place where I think all my years of service have entitled me to pick and choose what I'll do and where I'll go? Does His call, His sending, end at a certain age? Do I look for His "well done" here and now, or realize that cannot come until I've run the whole race? A race that continues right up till the moment He calls me home.

I know the real answer to that. So do you. I'm not my own. I wasn't when I was a young man, and I'm not now as a much older one. I had nothing when I embarked on the journey, so I had nothing really to lose. That's not the case now. I have much to lose, at least as to how the world reckons things. I'm called, as are you, to reckon things in a different way. When the Father spoke those words in Isaiah 6:8, He wasn't speaking specifically to Isaiah, but to whoever would hear Him and come to Him in order to be sent. Isaiah heard, came, and went out. That has to be the way for each of us. He is always calling, and nothing, not age, or security, or other obligations can keep us from the answer. My part, and yours, in all of it is to say, "Here I am Lord." Surrendered, totally available, sent. Young or old, rich or poor, there is no other option if we are truly His. So the question comes, where we are right now, are we truly His?

Blessings,