I contemplated whether I should share this or not. I've always sought to be transparent concerning my life, but there are some things too complicated and painful to talk freely of. This is one of them.
In the previous writing, I exhorted parents to have hope that the Lord would bring their children home to Himself and to them. He is faithful to do this. I know because it was a reality in my life as well.....
In my broken marriage, there was a little girl. I'll call her Cassie to protect her. She was blonde, blue-eyed, and beautiful. She was pure joy to be with and had the most tender heart toward His Holy Spirit. I remember her shedding tears in many a service, once at only 5 years old, saying that she wanted to be a "better girl" than she had been. Missionaries who visited our home always spoke of how special she was. She was not mine by birth, but she was raised as my daughter, and I was every bit her father. That all changed as her mother slowly drifted from both the Lord and our marriage. Eventually, she left me, and took Cassie with her. I had never adopted her as my own because her natural father still lived and I didn't feel it was right to do that. So when her mother took her away, I had no legal rights to her. I will never forget the agony of the day they left, holding her in my arms and weeping. I was not to hear or know almost anything of her for the next 10 years, though I continually cried out that He would bring her back to me. I believed that He promised that He would. After a decade, He did.
Cassie was a victim of the wreckage of our marriage and suffered because of it. She ran away at 16, became involved in a Haitian cult, and impregnated by its leader. She eventually returned home to North Carolina, began attending a church, and gave her heart to Jesus. Sometime after she came back to Christ she contacted me. I was overjoyed. It took some time, but we began to try and rebuild what was lost. In the interim, she met a young man and married. She had two children. On the surface, all seemed well, but Kim still carried many deep and unhealed wounds. She came to see me and spent a weekend with me. I had not seen her since she was 11 years old. It was a wonderful time, and we made plans for me to come see her the following month. That would not happen, because just as the enemy had crept into my marriage, he crept into hers. She left her husband, and eventually divorced him. She also left the Lord....again. She began a journey into New Age mysticism. She kept in loose contact with me, and I witnessed from afar the slow disintegration of her life. She became an alcoholic and that addiction took over her life to the extent that she eventually lost custody of her children. She would often call me late at night after she'd been drinking. She continued her downward spiral, and the beautiful young woman who had visited me soon looked 10 years older than she was. She was diagnosed with liver disease, and it took her life at the age of 41.
In my living room I have a wall filled with photos from my life. A number of them are of Cassie as a little girl. Smiling, happy, filled with life. His life. Whenever I look at them, I grieve over what the choices of others ended up bringing her to. Yes, she was responsible for her own choices, but a life was placed upon her that she never asked for or wanted. Her choices led to her death, but that is not the end of the story. She made one last choice before she left this life. That choice was to return to Christ. God brought her back to the land she had once belonged in and now belonged in again.
What happened with Cassie is not extreme. Many parents have suffered worse, but I share this story in order to exhort any who read it to never lose hope. I never saw the complete restoration of my relationship with Kim, but I did witness the restoration of her relationship with her Lord and Savior. I know she's with Him in eternity as I write this. I know that one day, all will be restored between us, and that laughing, beautiful, funny little girl that I spent so many wonderful hours playing with, taking along on pastoral visits, and listening to her stories about her day, will be with me again. God kept His promise. It didn't unfold the way I wanted, but in the end, it was for her eternal good and His great glory. He is faithful. Whatever land your child, grandchild, or loved one may be held in, trust Him. There is no "land" so dark, so far away, that He cannot bring them back from it. He brought Kim home. He'll bring them home as well. He's faithful.
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