Divided Hearts

 "God is spirit, and His worshippers must worship Him in spirit and in truth." John 4:24....."Jesus would have us not ask which requirements we are to fulfill, but what more of ourselves we can offer Him." Chris Tiegreen

I think, even after conversion, we are natural "bargainers" with God. We enter into negotiation with Him as to how we will relate with and obey Him. A lot of it can be unconscious for sure, but we do it nonetheless. I think a lot of our walk with Him has two underlying questions; How much do we actually have to give Him, and, how much can I disobey Him and get away with it? This comes from a divided heart. A heart that is not fully His and retains a good deal of self-interest.

I think we very often approach God like we do the government. At tax time, we look for every loophole we can in order to pay as little tax as possible. We never want to give too much. For many God is simply a higher form of government. We know He gives to us, but our clouded hearts see Him as a taker first, and a stingy giver last. We think He seeks our money and goods. What He wants is us. All of us. What we miss is that when we give Him all of ourselves, we get all of Him for all of our life needs. Spiritually, emotionally, materially, and physically. We see giving a tithe of our income as an obligation to be paid. We give our 10% and send Him on His way. He calls it an aspect of true worship. He's an extravagant God who gives to us in abundance. He doesn't need our money or goods, but He has chosen to need us. He wants the offering of ourselves, freely given. So few of us ever see or understand this, and it grieves His heart deeply. We often give Him 10% of our income while withholding 90% of ourselves.

I don't think we ever really ask the second question "out loud," but I think the divided heart always has it just beneath the surface. Basically, we want to know just how close to the unbelieving culture of the world can we get and still be right with Him? The self-deception present in that question is clear to everyone but ourselves. We see it as asking what duties must we perform to keep His approval while at the same time indulging our flesh and carrying out our unclean desires. On any given Sunday you'll find many singing hymns and praises in the camp of the Lord who have spent most of the week living in the camp of the world in their thought lives, their relationships, their attitudes, and their personal conduct. Again, this is the way of the divided heart. To what degree, on these two questions, is it also the way of ours?

We can never really worship Him with such a heart. Indeed, such hearts may be the main reason we work so hard at trying to generate enthusiasm in our worship. We may succeed in getting some kind of emotional response, but it isn't worship. It isn't an offering of full hearted devotion to Him. An offering that has no restrictions or limits. It just offers all to Him. And there is only one pathway to such worship, to such devotion. Yielding our divided hearts to Him. Confessing and repenting of all our self-centered religious activity, being emptied of it all, and in return, filled up with all the fullness of His Spirit and Life.

"All to Jesus I surrender. All to Him I freely give." The words to an old and loved hymn. It is also what it is to worship Him in spirit and in truth. It's the heart of worship. Is it your heart and mine? Or, do we go on seeking to negotiate our offerings to Him, and measure our degree of obedience? Will we come to Him with all our heart, or a divided one?

Blessings,

Pastor O